Low Cut

Comets

Certainly, you can imagine that souls have no real shape or form. They could be rounded and plush like clouds, or faceted and compact like gems. Maybe they are completely transparent, save for a single point of light. Perhaps it depends on the person they came from, or the next person they will be.

So it isn’t impossible to believe they could stretch for miles. If not all, then maybe parts of them reach out above and below. Long tails like comets, projecting behind them, leaving a path that alters gravity on some small scale. A sighting or a special event sought out in the night sky.

What if that happens while you’re still alive, and your soul is still inside you? Small parts of you, invisible to the eye, reach out without you knowing? To all the wants and desires you never talk about, the dreams you never attained. The people you never see anymore. The loves you can’t get over.

Each silent, auxiliary piece of us would still be us. The most concentrated version of us. With its own whorled structure, like a fingerprint. Its own level of warmth as it passes. A signature scent that wafts in its wake. A custom sound, too, the same way Tesla owners choose a backup warning as a personality trait.

And also, our weaknesses? An inability to calm oneself, a shameful compulsion for self-soothing. Incredible, all-consuming lust that blots out all other brain activity. Insecurity that wraps around the throat like a cold, dead hand. A restlessness that rivals even the most haunted of ghosts.

Your soul is showing, then, like a slip peeking out. It’s completely betraying your best efforts to be cool. But it’s also finding the other souls; the ones who are the same temperature, color, taste. Entangling tails as they sniff each other, get in to the real parts.

And when they do — get all wrapped up like that — there’s no undoing it. It would be easier to untangle a million fine strands of gold chains and pendants.

That’s why it’s so hard to forget them.

Standard
Basic Cotton

Facade

Which version of me do people see?

I ask myself first thing in the morning, all the fluid still puffing my face. My hair an absolute catastrophe of errant waves and wisps. It seems almost disingenuous that it isn’t this one.

And when I’m in the gym, is it this one? Gyrating (some would say, uselessly?) on the elliptical. Pumping my shoulders and arms with weights and pushups. Panting through burpies. Sweat and salt, and not in the good ways.

Or while vacuuming the office, and I’m finding a dead moth folded on the floor, in a corner. Picking it up delicately by the wing, so as not to disturb it, and tossing it over the balcony as a proper burial. Maybe her?

After a shower, is it the me who is slathering myself in age defying oils and moisturizers. Spritzing on perfume. Matching my bra to my panties. Wondering if they are too worn yet, too passe. Does underwear actually go out of style?

Walking out the door, locking it behind me. Which version of me is my outfit? Straight to work me. Polished for dinner me. Playful and creative me, regardless of the destination. Do my sunglasses nail it into place? I might have to switch them out.

Coming home, me. Exhausted and showering, slipping on the least amount of clothing, melting slowly into bed. Or me, tipsy and sexy, sending you videos as I undress. Remembering what it was like to have you in my bed. In my kitchen. In my life.

Or is it this me, quietly drinking tea, looking out the window at all the cars passing by. Normal people, normal schedules. Imagining that they all have families, purpose, radios on in the background. Futures spread out grandly before them, like wide open plains or the autobahn. Any number of possibilities. All the money in the world. Passing hands, theirs for the taking. Muscles and blood and bones under skin, behind faces, powered by pure will.

That was also me.

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